体验死亡（北春、2000、7）—“六•四”一周年祭
一
纪念碑一阵阵抽泣
大理石的纹路浸透血迹
信念和青春扑倒在
坦克履带的铁锈下
东方那古老的故事
突然新鲜欲滴
浩荡的人流渐渐消失
犹如一条慢慢干枯的河
两岸的风景化作石头
所有的喉咙都被恐惧窒息
所有的颤抖都随硝烟散去
只有刽子手的钢盔闪闪发光
二
我不再认识旗帜
旗帜象还不懂事的孩子
扑在妈妈尸体上哭喊着回家
我再不能分辨白昼和黑夜
时间被枪声惊呆
象失去记忆的植物人
我丢掉了身份证和护照
那个曾经熟悉的世界
在刺刀挑起的黎明中
找不到一捧泥土
掩埋自己
赤裸裸的心
与钢铁碰撞
没有水没有绿色的大地
一任阳光蹂躏
三
他们等呀等
等待变成野兽的时刻
等待时间编出精致的谎言
直等到
手指变成利爪
眼睛变成枪口
双脚变成履带
空气变成命令
来了
终于来了
那个等了五千年的命令
开枪——杀人
杀人——开枪
和平请愿与手无寸铁
拄拐的白发与扯着衣襟的小手
决不能说服刽子手
枪筒打红了
双手染红了
眼睛烧红了
一粒子弹
一股浑浊的宣泄
一次犯罪
一种英雄的壮举
多么轻松
死亡就如此降临
多么容易
兽欲就得到满足
那些年轻的士兵
也许刚刚穿上军装
还没有经历过
被姑娘亲吻的醉意
却在刹那间
体验到嗜血的快感
杀人是他们青春的开始
他们
看不见浸透连衣裙的血
听不见挣扎着的尖叫
对钢盔的坚硬和生命的脆弱
他们毫无感觉
他们不知道
一个昏庸的老人
正在把古老的京城
变成又一处奥斯维辛
残忍与罪恶拔地而起
象金字塔一样辉煌
而生命崩溃如深渊
听不到一丝回响
屠杀雕刻出一个民族的传统
岁月悠悠，如废弃的语言
做最后的诀别
四
我本想在阳光下
加入殉道者的行列
用仅存的一根骨头
支撑起虔诚的信仰
但，天空并不会
为牺牲者镀上金黄
一群饱食死尸的狼
在正午的温暖中
喜气洋洋
遥远地
我把生命放逐到
一个没有太阳的地方
逃出耶稣生日的纪元
我不敢正视十字架上的目光
从一支烟到一小堆灰烬
我被烈士的酒灌醉
以为这个春天已经消逝
当我在深夜的烟摊前
被几个大汉拦路抢劫
戴上手铐蒙住眼睛堵住嘴巴
扔进不知驶向何方的囚车
蓦然醒悟：我还活着
当我的名字在中央电视台
变成新闻中的“黑手”
无名者的白骨立在遗忘里
变成一枚英雄勋章
我被自编的谎言高高擎起
逢人便讲我体验过死亡
尽管我知道
死是神秘的未知
活着，便无法体验死亡
而死了
就再不能体验死亡
但
我仍在死中飞翔
沉沦地飞翔
无数个铁窗后的夜晚
和星光下的坟墓
被我的噩梦出卖
除了谎言
我一无所有
1990年6月于秦城监狱
体验死亡（北春、2000、7）—“六•四”一周年祭 Experience the death of (North Spring, 2000,7) - "6 • 4" 1 anniversary of the Festival
回覆刪除一 1
纪念碑一阵阵抽泣
大理石的纹路浸透血迹
信念和青春扑倒在
坦克履带的铁锈下
东方那古老的故事
突然新鲜欲滴
Waves/sounds of sobbing/weeping around the Memorial Monument
The marble engravings are stained/soaked with blood
All faith and youth have to surrender/yield
Under the rusty belts/wheels of the tanks
The old story of the ancient Orient
Suddenly become fresh and alive/dripping
浩荡的人流渐渐消失
犹如一条慢慢干枯的河
两岸的风景化作石头
所有的喉咙都被恐惧窒息
所有的颤抖都随硝烟散去
只有刽子手的钢盔闪闪发光
Mighty crowds/flows of people have disappeared
Like a river slowly drying up
The scenes/views/landscape on both shores/sides have turned into bare rocks/stones
All the throats are suffocated/choked by fear
All the trembling are dispersed along with the gun-smoke
Only the executioner's /murderers’ helmets are still bright/glistening
二 Two
我不再认识旗帜
旗帜象还不懂事的孩子
扑在妈妈尸体上哭喊着回家
我再不能分辨白昼和黑夜
时间被枪声惊呆
象失去记忆的植物人
我丢掉了身份证和护照
那个曾经熟悉的世界
在刺刀挑起的黎明中
找不到一捧泥土
掩埋自己
I can no longer recognize the flags/banners
The banners are like an innocent child
Covering the corpse of the mother and crying to go home
I can no longer distinguish between day and night
Time has been stunned/shocked by the shooting/gunfire noise
as loss of memory in persistent vegetative states,
I lost identity cards and passports
that had been familiar with the The world
can not find the dawn of the bayonet
to stir up a handful of mud
buried their own
赤裸裸的心与钢铁碰撞没有水没有绿色的大地一任阳光蹂躏 Naked heart and steel there is no water there is no collision term sun-torn land of green
三 Three
他们等呀等等待变成野兽的时刻等待时间编出精致的谎言直等到手指变成利爪眼睛变成枪口双脚变成履带空气变成命令来了终于来了那个等了五千年的命令呀, etc., etc. They wait for the moment into a beast waiting time to compile the sophisticated lies straight into the eye until your fingers into claws the air gun legs turned into a command to the track finally came five thousand years of waiting for an order that
开枪——杀人杀人——开枪和平请愿与手无寸铁拄拐的白发与扯着衣襟的小手决不能说服刽子手枪筒打红了双手染红了眼睛烧红了一粒子弹一股浑浊的宣泄一次犯罪一种英雄的壮举 Shoot - kill kill - shoot unarmed peaceful demonstrations and Shui Zhu skirts of white hair and inviting little hands never able to convince the executioner barrel hit his hands dyed red eyes and red-hot bullets of a vent turbidity Yi Gu a crime of a heroic feat
体验死亡（北春、2000、7）—“六•四”一周年祭
回覆刪除Experiencing the death (North Spring, 2000,7) - "6 • 4"Elegy for 1st anniversary
纪念碑一阵阵抽泣
大理石的纹路浸透血迹
信念和青春扑倒在
坦克履带的铁锈下
东方那古老的故事
突然新鲜欲滴
Waves/sounds of sobbing/weeping around the Memorial Monument
The marble engravings are stained/soaked with blood
All faith and youth have to surrender/yield
Under the rusty belts/wheels of the tanks
The old story of the ancient Orient
Suddenly become fresh and alive/dripping
浩荡的人流渐渐消失
犹如一条慢慢干枯的河
两岸的风景化作石头
所有的喉咙都被恐惧窒息
所有的颤抖都随硝烟散去
只有刽子手的钢盔闪闪发光
Mighty crowds/flows of people have disappeared
Like a river slowly drying up
The scenes/views/landscape on both shores/sides have turned into bare rocks/stones
All the throats are suffocated/choked by fear
All the trembling are dispersed along with the gun-smoke
Only the executioner's /murderers’ helmets are still bright/glistening
二 Two
我不再认识旗帜
旗帜象还不懂事的孩子
扑在妈妈尸体上哭喊着回家
我再不能分辨白昼和黑夜
时间被枪声惊呆
象失去记忆的植物人
我丢掉了身份证和护照
那个曾经熟悉的世界
在刺刀挑起的黎明中
找不到一捧泥土
掩埋自己
I can no longer recognize the flags/banners
The banners are like an innocent child
Covering the corpse of the mother and crying to go home
I can no longer distinguish between day and night
Time has been stunned/shocked by the shooting/gunfire noise
as loss of memory in persistent vegetative states,
I lost identity cards and passports
that had been familiar with the The world
can not find the dawn of the bayonet
to stir up a handful of mud
buried their own
赤裸裸的心
与钢铁碰撞
没有水没有绿色的大地
一任阳光蹂躏
The naked heart
Has collided with steel
there is no water nor green on this lande
is no collision term
sun-torn land of green
三 Three
他们等呀等
等待变成野兽的时刻
等待时间编出精致的谎言
直等到手指变成利爪
眼睛变成枪口
双脚变成履带
空气变成命令
来了
终于来了
那个等了五千年的命令呀,
They wait ed and waited
They waited for the moment when the beast appeared
They waited for the time when sophisticated lies are compiled/evidenced
Until the fingers turned into claws
The eyes turned into gun-points/gun-barrels
The feet turned into tankwheels/belts
The air turned into orders
It has come
It has at last come
The order which has waited for five thousand years
straight into the eye until your fingers into claws the air gun legs turned into a command to the track finally came five thousand years of waiting for an order that
开枪——杀人
杀人 ——开枪
和平请愿与手无寸铁
拄拐的白发与扯着衣襟的小手
决不能说服刽子手
枪筒打红了双手
染红了眼睛
烧红了一粒子弹
一股浑浊的宣泄
一次犯罪
一种英雄的壮举
Shoot --- kill
Kill --- shoot
peaceful demonstrations and unarmed
white hairs with cranes and little hands hanging/pulling on skirts
will never convince the executioners
barrel hit his hands dyed red
eyes dyed red
bullets hot and red
a turbid/dirty Catharsis/relief/purge
a criminal act
a heroic feat